How Does Mediation Work in a Tennessee Divorce?

When a couple wants to avoid litigation, or can agree on most factors of their divorce, they can turn to a mediator to help them get over those final hurdles. Mediation is a type of alternative dispute resolution, and it’s a really helpful way to find compromise in a divorce.

And if you’re getting divorced in Tennessee, it’s required. All couples have to go through mediation. It’s supposed to cut down on the tension and move the process along  more smoothly and quickly, so that you don’t get caught up in needless fighting. (There are exceptions, of course; cases involving domestic violence are typically exempt from mediation for safety reasons.) 

The mediation process assists divorcing couples with issues that they may not have been able to come to an agreement on by themselves, such as:

• Dividing debt
• Dividing property, assets, and trusts
• Child custody arrangements
• Plans for parenting
• Alimony
• Child visitation
• Child support
• Retirement
• Taxes

What typically happens during mediation?

When you and your ex-spouse schedule a meeting with your mediator, your Franklin divorce attorney will attend the meeting(s) with you. It is important to know that the mediation meeting will be confidential, and you may or may not be in the same room as your ex-spouse during the meeting. Mediation typically does not take a long time. 

There are a few ways divorce mediation may proceed:

1. All parties meet together. You, your soon-to-be-ex, your respective attorneys, and the mediator all sit down together and hash things out. 
2. The mediator “shuttles” between you. You and your attorney sit in one room, and your ex and their attorney sit elsewhere. The mediator moves between both of you. 
3. You conduct it online. In some cases, the sessions may take place via video consultation, where everyone meets up online. 

Your attorney will support you throughout the mediation process, giving you legal advice or recommendations along the way. Your mediator cannot give any advice and must remain neutral. So if you have any questions or want to know what will happen if you agree or do not agree to something, ask your lawyer. 

After the session is over, the mediator will let the judge know that you and your ex-spouse attended mediation and whether an agreement was reached. You and your ex-spouse will also sign and enter into a written agreement before leaving the mediation room. Your attorney will provide you with a draft of everything you agreed or did not agree to, such as child support, child custody, property division, and more.

Do you need a lawyer to attend mediation?

You do not need to have a lawyer to attend mediation. However, it can be very beneficial if you have one. The reason for this is because a lawyer can make sure that you understand everything the mediator or other party is asking you to agree to. Your ex-spouse may have an attorney who knows the tricks and tactics to get you to negotiate and agree to unfair things that you may not fully understand. Therefore, if you choose to hire a lawyer to attend mediation with you, you can have peace of mind knowing that you comprehend everything in the agreement and that you are comfortable with your decisions.

How do you choose a divorce mediator?

Here’s how it works in Tennessee:

"In general, you choose your mediator from a list provided by the Court Clerk. Each of the mediators on the list received training in mediating family disputes and several of the mediators received specialized training in mediating cases where there is the presence or threat of domestic violence. If domestic violence is present in your family, you need to tell the Court. The victims of domestic violence are not required to go to mediation, but if they go, victims have certain rights in the mediation."

Why you should give divorce mediation a chance

There are a lot of benefits of going through mediation, even if it’s required by the court. Those benefits include:

• Confidentiality. Court proceedings are public, but mediation is private. Everything you say is kept private, and the process is confidential. 
• Cost sharing benefits. Mediation costs are shared by both parties, and the only costs are for the mediator (usually around $50 an hour, split between you). It’s far less expensive than litigation, which you may be able to avoid entirely if you can hash out the details of the agreement during your session(s). 
• Time saving benefits. Mediation typically lasts a couple hours, maybe a full day. If you have substantial assets it could take longer, but most folks are done pretty fast. 
• Reduced conflict. The thing about mediation is that it forces you to stay on topic and focus on the issues, while finding places where you can compromise. If things have been heated, mediation sessions can sometimes help you get beyond the tension. And if that doesn’t work…
• Room for change. If mediation fails, it doesn’t have any effect on the outcome of your case. The only thing that matters is that signed agreement, and if you don’t sign it, it won’t affect you. 

If you have any questions or concerns regarding mediation or divorce, please do not hesitate to get in touch with a divorce lawyer at your earliest convenience. Whether your divorce is a contested or uncontested divorce case, a divorce attorney has the experience and knowledge to explain to you what the process may entail and the legal options that may be available to you. Contact a lawyer today to ensure that you receive the best outcome possible for your divorce case.